Prose – Various Forms & Formats

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Shadow was especially protective of his territory against competitive feline interlopers. In his earlier days, he was a bit more forgiving with the two male kittens that we nicknamed “Fluff” and “Pudge,” who used to frequent our place – even though they came from our neighbors with the mean momma kitty who used to chase Shadow up trees. Fluff was a long-haired pretty and lovable kitten who was very good-natured. Pudge was a very athletic ornery shit who liked to hunt birds in our yard. His favorite target was our bluebird house that he’d – amazingly – hop on top of to snag birds as they came out of the entry hole. I ended up jiggering together a rickety umbrella-like contraption out of sticks and wire and fastening it to the pole supporting the bird house to kept him from leaping up on it. Surprisingly, it worked pretty well, and the birds liked the extra landing spots around the bird house.

We occasionally allowed Fluff and Pudge into our house. Shadow didn’t seem to mind. Once in a while they’d scuffle, but usually got along. Hubby didn’t want the two guest cats going into the master bedroom at the end of the hall, but Pudge was persistent, so Hubby got the bright idea to use a water spray bottle to discourage him from going down the hall. Pudge didn’t like that and decided to exact his retribution. We didn’t know he’d sneaked into the bedroom until I saw Shadow standing in the hallway looking in that direction with a wide-eyed “Damn, Dude!” expression on his face. We went back there to discover Pudge had done some revenge spraying all over the headboard and pillows of our bed, which was quite the ordeal to clean up. Afterward, I noticed Pudge spraying everywhere in our yard. It wasn’t long till I saw Shadow and Fluff running Pudge off – and he was never again seen in these parts.

Over the years, Shadow had altercations with various neighborhood cats who ventured into our yard, his sworn territory. He usually managed to keep most interlopers at bay, but occasionally I intervened with stern words or a broom to chase off persistent unwelcome guests to avoid outright cat fights. A couple times I ended up having to coax a very young Shadow down from the large oak tree shading our patio, where he’d escaped to avoid certain harm. As the tree got taller, my rescue attempts became more challenging. The last time I had to get him out of the tree, it was late at night, and I was in pajamas, outside trying everything I could think of to create a safe retreat out of the tree, even going so far as to stack a patio chair on top of table to give him a pathway to jump down, but he stayed put on a very high limb I couldn’t reach. Finally I went in the house, grabbed the keys to Hubby’s truck, and pulled the truck into the yard, as close as possible under the tree. Shadow finally jumped down onto the roof and then the hood of the truck, and finally down to the ground. I’m sure he would have figured things out on his own eventually, but I wasn’t going to leave it to chance. The next morning, Hubby was surprised to find his truck parked in the yard – not where he’d left it the day before.

At an early age, Shadow made his preferences clear when a neighbor’s very friendly (and apparently horny) female cat came over, trying to entice him. He was not interested and ended up running off that female cat, chasing her back to her own yard. One fine day, when Shadow was a mature adult, we saw him lounging on the patio next to a nice looking spotted white and gray tabby cat. Considering Shadow’s preferences made known early in his juvenile years, we assumed his new friend was a male cat. Shadow looked up at us standing on the back porch and casually put a paw on the front leg of the cat beside him. We were surprised but happy to see he was comfortable with his new friend.

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Shadow was not a fan of dogs. My mom brought her little Maltese, Toby, with her for a short visit, and Shadow behaved in his usual aloof manner, keeping a respectful distance while keeping an eye on the unwanted guest. But Toby, being the happy-go-lucky dude that he was, wanted to be instant friends with everyone. Shadow wasn’t having any of that, and when Hubby brought Toby in from outside after do-doing his duty, Shadow took a swipe at Toby as he slipped past to escape outside, causing a little fluff of white fur to fly up in the air. Hubby quickly picked up Toby to inspect him for damage, but didn’t see red, so we were lucky that time.

Oscar’s story was a bit different. One of my nieces, who had several cats and somehow thought a dog would be good to add to the mix, had taken in Oscar, a red short-haired Dachshund, as a trial adoptee. Unfortunately, most Dachshunds, being bred to hunt small prey, are prone to chasing other animals and chewing on furniture. Oscar loved to chase cats, and nothing would dissuade him from that activity. My niece had dropped the dog off at my sisters’ house for a couple days while she made an emergency out-of-state trip, and my sisters, having several cats of their own, found it nearly impossible to deal with Oscar’s cat-chasing antics. So they suggested I take him home for a “sleepover.” Hubby was gone on a solo family visit at the time, so I stupidly agreed.

Oscar was friendly enough and did well in the car ride to our house, lounging comfortably in his elevated dog seat and looking out the window. By the time we got home, it was dark and close to bedtime. Shadow was outside waiting for me, ready to come greet me in his usual manner – until he saw the unexpected house guest. Standing perfectly still on the patio, illuminated under the motion-sensor light, he assessed this new WTF threat. Immediately Oscar charged at Shadow. But instead of turning and running away, Shadow, with lightning speed, swiped at Oscar. Oscar yelped and backed up, perhaps for the first time in his life, finally meeting his match.

Oscar scurried back to me, and I quickly checked him for injury. He had a small nick on the top of his snout that was just fur-deep, but otherwise looked OK. He followed close behind, using me as a protective barrier to steer clear of Shadow. But Shadow wasn’t deterred. He dogged Oscar everywhere he went inside the house, making the poor pooch extremely nervous – so nervous, that he scrambled after me wherever I went as I prepared for bed. I told the two of them that they’d have to “work things out,” that I wasn’t going to stay up all night playing referee. The way things worked out was that Oscar ended up on one side of the bed beside me, covered up to his chin, with his ears fanned out on the pillow like a movie star’s hair. Shadow sat at the foot of the bed, staring at Oscar probably the whole night without sleeping a wink. I took Oscar back to my sisters’ early the next morning, and he seemed very happy to go. He did not end up as a permanent part of my niece’s animal family, but he was certainly a cutie – although I’m sure Shadow would have disagreed with that assessment.

The one dog Shadow seemed OK with was our friend’s Australian silky, Kinky (Kingston). Our friend went on an extended trip, and we ended up keeping Kinky at our house for about a month. The Australian silky looks like an overgrown Yorkshire Terrier but is much more robust and generally more intelligent. Kinky, a smart boy who always respectfully deferred to other pets and rarely got into tussles, gave Shadow his space. They’d touch noses once in a while but otherwise coexisted without incident. The only problem was two bad habits Kinky had – going on unsupervised walkabouts outside, and getting into the trash. The first time we realized the trash was going to be a continual problem, I was sitting in the living room in my recliner doing something on my laptop and noticed Shadow standing in the hall way, staring wide-eyed at the kitchen with that now familiar “Damn, Dude!” expression on his face. I got up and found Kinky rooting around next to the overturned trashcan, in the middle of a huge mess of trash scattered all over the floor. He got yelled at quite earnestly, but that didn’t stop the trash raids until we started putting the can on top of the table and closing the bathroom door.

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Other animal invaders were less easily dealt with. When we first had our sunroom built onto the back of the house, Hubby buried an underground drain to help divert water from the sunroom roof gutter downspout, out past the patio. He devised an open drain at ground level, with a grate cap that could be removed to clean out debris and keep the flow channel from getting stopped up. Every day we’d find that grate cap lying off to the side of the drain opening and wondered how it kept getting removed. We finally figured out that somebody (some animal) was prying it off to get to a water source, no matter how stagnant it was.

When Shadow joined our family, he spent his days outside while we were at work, unless the weather was terrible. If I anticipated no rain, I’d leave a bowl of dry food and a bowl of water for him on the back porch top step. Usually the food would be completely gone by the time I returned home, despite the fact that Shadow rarely touched dry food when given other food choices. I figured he was probably hungry enough during the day to eat dry food even though it wasn’t normally his preference. One night I forgot to bring the bowl in and went to the back door to fetch it, but found a big old possum helping himself to what was left in the bowl. I figured just opening the back door would encourage our unwanted late-night dinner guest to leave, but he just stared up at me and then went back to eating. I decided that his dinner plans were more important than my desire to retrieve the food bowl, so I left him to it.

After that, I stopped leaving food outside, deciding instead to set out a large metal water bowl on the patio. Intending it primarily for Shadow, since he spent a lot of time outside, I also acknowledged that various ground animals needed a steady water source. Magically, the gutter drain grate cover stopped being removed, and the community water bowl became an instant hit with area birds who’d happily jump in to use it as a bird bath. I ended up having to refresh the water daily, sometimes several times a day, and empty it and refill it often in freezing weather.

Shortly after the possum incident, there was another after-dark interaction with an unwelcome guest. I went to the back door to call Shadow inside but saw a skunk meandering around on the patio, with Shadow nowhere in sight. Deciding prudently not to startle the skunk by opening the back door, I instead went to the front door to see if I could call Shadow and coax him in, even though he rarely if ever used the front door. Amazingly, when I opened the front door, I saw him standing on the sidewalk near the front porch, waiting, as if he’d read my mind and knew to come round to the front door. He wasted no time coming inside.

The most recent incident with a skunk happened about a year ago. Again, I went to the back door at night to call Shadow in. The outside sensor lights were on, and I saw Shadow standing in the driveway, watching a skunk on the patio about ten feet away, heading straight for him. Quickly I opened the door, and Shadow scurried up the steps and slid inside. I slammed the door shut, shaken by that close call.

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